Working Through

With wine, natch.

It was a rough day of obsessing, deleting Twi.tter from my phone for the umpteenth time, and setting up a cover page to announce this blog's indefinite hiatus.

Sometimes the online world is too overwhelming for me. Shame spirals engulf me over the fact that no one appears to be reading this blog, plus feelings of inadequacy that I don't have a purpose on this blog anymore. Truth is, I don't know how to focus it. Sometimes, I want to have a blog dedicated to adoption issues and really diving in on those issues, but then I remember others before me have done it better. Plus, I don't have much to write about these days.

My posts used to get recognized, and now they are so mundane that they haven't been recognized for years. It makes me feel like no one wants to read about my struggles through mental health issues that pervade my family. When I convince myself that no one wants to know me, I retreat and become angry, walling myself off.

This is me trying to resist the urge to wall off.

I guess I'll keep blogging.

NaBloPoMo November 2015