Hi, I’m Tara.

What started out as a private blog to document our adoption journey has evolved into my journey through therapy, spiritual awakening and whatever I feel like writing. Without our struggles to build a family, I’m not sure I’d be waking up, and for that I’m grateful.

How I Cope

No, no, not a rambling long-ass post about how I can't stand that a friend of mine just named her baby boy Calvin. Darn it - that was in our top 5!!!!! Just a funny little anecdote. I was in a meeting presenting results of a report and was asked when I could get it finalized (typically we have 2 weeks). Well, I have to go to freakin' Pennsylvania sometime in the next 3 weeks so there was some discussion of how to schedule the final report. Another engineer in my group made the comment "Oh, there is that other contingency, right?" I'm thinking, no, just this one and I'm planning on visiting the other dam in November. So I look at him like "what the hell are you talking about - did I miss something?" He says, "baby". Oh, right, that. The fact that it didn't even enter into my brain as a possibility of interefering with work right now must say something about my state of mind. And I'd say the verdict is good.  While I'm stressing out about the fact that I can't bring myself to call pediatricians or shop for a car seat, it's because I've brainwashed myself into thinking nothing will happen until at least June of next year.  Hey, it's I'll have to remember to revisit this post next June just to see how different my attitude is then.  ;-)


Fair Warning...Probably TMI...