I'm 95% sure that I'm not pregnant. Yet, in the back of my mind that 5% is a source of wondering. It's constant. A niggling annoyance in the back of my head as I go about the day. I keep counting the days. I keep trying to figure out why I have these symptoms. A crappy diet over the holidays that messed up the delicate balance of hormones? That could easily be the culprit. In fact, it probably is since I went on a "I'm eating to feel good" binge. Read: sugar!!!!! So the acid reflux is back, digestion has been....um off, and certain parts of me hurt like a mofo. None of it is normal.
In about a week, I'll know that I'm having trouble recovering from a crappy diet and life will go on for another month.
Before infertility, I would be excitedly waiting to POAS. I would be dreaming of having a bouncing baby. I would be worried about how my body would react to pregnancy. Now? Occasionally, I get early pregnancy symptoms, when clearly, I can't get pregnant! I can't wait for the cycle to be over. I breathe a sigh of relief when it starts again.