X: "Ok, make sure you burp him one more time!"
X at school, as reported by his teacher: "My daddy and the crying baby are going to pick me up today"
X: "I slept in my bed all night long!" (after waking up in Mommy and Daddy's bed, which he migrates to at about 11:30pm-12:30am every night)
Me: "You can earn back your legos by going to sleep in your bed without a fuss."
X: "Those are Daddy's legos, they aren't my legos"
Everyone we meet: "Do you have a new little brother?"
X: "He cries"
X: "I'm going to eat all my dinner and then I can have a treat!"
(doesn't finish dinner, pesky vegetables)
X: "Now I can have a treat!"
Me: "You need to eat all your broccoli/carrots/blah blah blah first"
X: "Well, I don't like those, they're yucky. Can I have a snack?" (snacks and treats are different. One is sweet, one isn't....)
X: "Daddy we need to go pick up my artwork!"
S: "What is it?"
X: "It's a scribble!" (black dot on a red piece of paper)