I had therapy. Still on the fence about the therapist and I'm having a really hard time figuring out if my uncomfortable-ness is because I'm in the super hard, super sh*tty part of therapy, or if it's because me and Dr. D don't click. She's had some good insights and advice on my work conundrum, and is suggesting that I make my own work-life balance. Which makes me uncomfortable because I am horrible at asking for what I need. It's so hard. My pattern my entire life has been to be shut down and walled off and keep all emotions close to the vest. Until it's too much and I explode, usually in anger. Anger is my go-to emotion. Some women cry, I want to break things.
I thought, hey, I need to write this down. Instead of writing a blog last night and being coherent about it, I decided to tweet a whole bunch.