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Hi, I’m Geochick.

Welcome to my blog. What started out as a private blog to document our adoption journey has evolved into my journey through therapy and spiritual awakening. Without our struggles to build a family, I’m not sure I’d be waking up, and for that I’m grateful.

Updating My Emotional Rating System Among Other Things

After riding the roller coaster of depression, anxiety and feeling ok for a few weeks, I decided I need an updated system. There’s been many challenges and an episode where I’ve made a big decision and rode out the emotional ramifications. 

The big news is that I quit my gym. I loved that place for almost a year, and then coaches left, people left, the program changed. I hung in there for several months, but it didn’t feel the same, plus I was still getting injured and staying injured. I finally pulled the plug when I realized I was being triggered because I felt I was being ignored when I reached out for help with how to approach my workouts given my back and neck were in a state of jacked-up-ness on the regular. I forfeited 2 weeks and quit in the middle of the month.

I had been triggered by them while in a state of depression, was feeling a lot of anger at the same time, and felt like my decision was knee-jerk until this happened: Therapist #3’s reaction to the decision was to point out it was a huge step to recognize my worthiness and leave. And she told me she was proud of me for being able to recognize what I need. 

Anyway, to capture what I went through during and after that, I’ve tweaked some of my ratings. I realized I need an anxiety rating because I definitely vacillate between depression and anxiety.  

  1. Awful 😭

  2. really really bad 😩

  3. can’t get out of bed ☹️

  4. flooded - angry and/or crying, non-functional 🤬😭

  5. numb, emotions shut down but functioning 😶

  6. Meh. Going thru motions 😐

  7. Anxious, jittery 😬

  8. pretty good 🙂

  9. feeling well and meaning it. 😊

  10. Ah-mazing 😁

Pan.dora's Box

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH IS ENOUGH