Hi, I’m Tara.

What started out as a private blog to document our adoption journey has evolved into my journey through therapy, spiritual awakening and whatever I feel like writing. Without our struggles to build a family, I’m not sure I’d be waking up, and for that I’m grateful.

#MicroblogMondays - Whole30 Week 2

Non Scale Victories (NSV)

  • I didn’t drink alcohol for 12 days

  • I did a tough snowshoe hike and stuck to the plan

  • I ordered off restaurant menus and customized to fit the plan

  • I find it pretty easy to do the food even when on the go

  • Overall feeling pretty good through the day

  • No blood sugar crashes (I didn’t get them often anyway, my diet was pretty ok…)

The things that are bugging me and making want to bail

  • My sleep sucks. I’m sleeping more and not feeling rested when I wake up. I’m remembering dreams and they aren’t fun.

  • My energy has kind of returned but I don’t feel great

  • I get really tired early at night

  • I don’t feel like doing hard workouts or lifting weights

  • The diet is stressful

  • I tracked my calories for the 16 days I’ve been on the diet. It turns out to be a high fat, pretty high protein, low carbohydrate diet. I feel like I’m doing it wrong

  • I’m feeling anger and expressing anger in all the wrong ways. I lost my mind more than once and last night broke down completely, screaming at the top of my lungs, the kind of primordial scream that comes from deep within. No reason, no major triggers, just everyday stressors of kids and work. THAT SUCKED.

  • I’m traveling this week and today had a headache since I woke up.

I don’t know how I'm going to hold on for another 2 weeks. I’ve fallen off the “don’t drink alcohol wagon” and while I tried my best to follow the diet at the restaurant tonight, the “mixed lettuce” salad was really iceberg served with a creamy (dairy) house dressing. I used very little dressing, but still, it’s dairy. The entrée was compliant. I drank 2 glasses of wine. I ate two croquettes, fried balls of goodness (non-compliant). I kind of don’t care.

I wish I could do diets like these more easily! When it comes to meeting my own expectations, it’s a mighty struggle.

Don’t know what #microblogmondays is? Check it out  here

Don’t know what #microblogmondays is? Check it out here

Bell Let’s Talk Day

#MicroblogMondays - Whole30 Week 1 aka Suckville