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Hi, I’m Tara.

What started out as a private blog to document our adoption journey has evolved into my journey through therapy, spiritual awakening and whatever I feel like writing. Without our struggles to build a family, I’m not sure I’d be waking up, and for that I’m grateful.

#MicroblogMondays - You're Really Getting into This...

I’ve heard that a few times lately around spirituality and the fact that I’m taking PSI classes (and volunteer staffing them). When that phrase is spoken to me about things I’m doing, it’s a trigger. I get defensive, for some reason I think I have to deflect and start qualifying what I’m doing instead of just letting it land.

Letting it land would probably result in well thought out responses like “yeah, I am”.

heh.

No, seriously, I could just say that and leave it. Instead, as I do more work, I’m starting to notice when the programs fire. The little programs that run me, that for whatever reason (my upbringing, my experiences in school, my experiences with men who seemingly hold my career’s power in their hands) fire automatically. I can feel a program fire when I’m agreeing with someone just because I want them to like me. I can feel it fire when I get frustrated in meetings. I can feel it fire when someone says, “You’re really getting into this aren’t you?”

I staffed the PSI Basic for a second time this past weekend and I can feel the tools and lessons starting to integrate. Different stuff came up for me during exercises and at the same time I could be outward focused on the students. I took risks, some were huge. HUGE. Like working through mommy-issues huge.

So, yeah, I’m really getting into this, and I can’t wait for the Life Success Course (psi-7). I can’t wait to be marooned on a ranch in California for 7 days working through all of it on a different level, busting up and breaking through.

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Stages of Healing

#MicroblogMonday - The Messy Middle